What to expect when you're over thinking your entire life.
I keep procrastinating everything in my life. Procrastinating when I eat to when I leave for work, writing, drawing, telling the father of my child that I want him in our lives. I talk a big game of being able to take care of myself and I can and I do. The thought of J not being an active father breaks my heart for our coming new born and for him. You meet people you can see through every so often. The active need to control the chaos you cause. The deeper pain of not feeling seen by the ones you were supposed to trust and love the most. The laughter covers the tears. It’s a hell of a lot easier to make someone laugh than to make them understand you on an intellectual and emotional level. That’s how I see him at least. Seeing through him doesn’t mean I know what he’s capable of or interested in. Nor does it mean that we could be together. It just means I’ve seen he’s been through things others haven’t. I don’t want to prevent him from meeting his child. I don’t want to dism...